Chapter 21

Boy – Reinhardt had always called Wilhelm that.

It was originally dark, but Reinhardt was willing to accept darkness because it was close to the dry personality of children who couldn’t eat and grow up with their families. The boy smiled at her like a blooming flower when she hugged him, however, Reinhardt had a gut feeling that she could no longer call the face in front of her by the name ‘boy.’

“Yes.”

The person who answered her quietly was completely different from what she remembered. When he had supported her in front of Dietrich’s coffin, she hadn’t been paying attention to him properly because of her heartbreaking sadness.

But now she can see him clearly in front of her. Reinhardt had an intuitive feeling that something she had never known before, precisely something she had felt but had been covered, was hidden in those dark eyes.

“… … I didn’t know it was you.”

She realized that the boy she met three years ago had already become a man. The light on the firewood burning in the fireplace burned scarlet and shone on his toned shoulders, his black hair, and his tanned skin from the battlefield. His chin had become sharp and thick, a stark difference from his baby fat before. When she saw the shadow beneath his sharp chin, Reinhardt asked herself like before.

A man? Can I call him a man?

Reinhardt’s intuition was working in a foolish way similar to how you would try and determine whether the sex of the beast in the forest is male or female. It was foolish because it was more important to differentiate whether the animal was a beast or not, before going onto its sex.

The combination of her sadness and fatigue over the last few days was dangerous because they crushed all of her intuitive feelings.

Reinhardt rubbed his forehead with a headache. Standing behind her, Wilhelm carefully helped her lean on the side, then fell down and knelt in front of her. With this movement, the danger Reinhardt felt for a moment disappeared like a bubble.

“I’m… sorry.”

The young man paused as he was apologizing.

It was a slow-paced talking.

Reinhardt was relieved from the tension she felt earlier. It was because his youth could be heard from the tone of his voice. Reinhardt shook her head lightly, shaking off the darkness she had seen briefly. It must’ve only been her illusion.

“No, it was me who was lost for a moment and didn’t pay attention. I’m sorry.”

After apologizing, Reinhardt took a deep breath and called out his name.

“Wilhelm.”

The young man’s eyes blinked in confusion when he heard his name being called. The shadow she had just seen disappeared and all that left was his watery eyes. Reinhardt was now sure that what she had just seen must be her own hallucination.

“Sorry. I had already heard what happened to Dietrich but…when I saw the coffin, I felt like my heart was breaking into pieces.”

He immediately lowered down his watery, black eyes as if trying to cover them, then lifted them up again. Reinhardt felt relief when she saw his eye flicker as he blinked.

This child must also be sad. In the future, he will also be confused.

Inside those hot, black eyes was clearly his burning sorrow. Reinhardt also experienced it once so she was sure she could recognize it. She was so overcome with sadness and depression when she lost her father that she couldn’t stop her emotions. It was unbearable because she lost the person she loved the most in the world. Anger, sadness, hatred, and vengeance – they were all mixed together. It would be better for her to throw it all out, but with the emptiness that followed after losing him, she did not know what to do and missed the time to properly vent her emotions.

Moreover, it was hard for her to shake off the thought that he had died because of her, so the woman in her previous life dried up with hatred for 15 years. There was no way she can’t say no to this kid, besides….

“Sir Wilhelm had to choose. Sir Ernst or the people….”

Mark’s words came to her mind. Reinhardt’s eyes turned watery again.

“Oh, my God. What is this….”

“…… Viscountess.”

The man kneeling in front of her called her out of embarrassment, but Reinhardt was faster. She wiped the corners of her eyes with her palms, quickly kneeling down in front of him, made eye contact, and grabbed his hand.

“I’m sorry, Wilhelm.”

“….”

Surprised, the young man gaped but closed his mouth after. Reinhardt was squeezing the top of her left chest with her other hand and could barely speak.

“You must’ve also been sad and shocked by it, and I didn’t even take care of you….”

“Viscountess.”

“My God, what Viscountess? Who taught you that, Wilhelm?”

Reinhardt patted Wilhelm’s cheek as if she had heard heinous words. Wilhelm trembled in surprise. Reinhardt then closed her eyes and pulled him into a hug.

“I’m sorry. I threw you away….”

“No, no….”

The young man stuttered as he repeated. Reinhardt was embracing Wilhelm with her arms wide open, but his chest was so wide that her fingertips could barely reach each other, giving her a distant feeling. She was holding the boy she loves but it feels like that boy had drifted somewhere. She squeezed him, which made the young man in her arms flinch.

Dietrich said in the letter that the boy would be more mature in the future. He also wrote that she would be really surprised to see Wilhelm. But when Reinhardt finally met Wilhelm, her sadness was greater.

She could still remember that dirty little child. He was so skinny that both his wrists could fit in the palm of her hand when she was bathing him in the bathroom.

That little boy has grown so much. Now, the boy’s forearms were so thick that Reinhardt couldn’t even fit them in with both hands. But just because he’s big doesn’t mean he’s an adult. The pain Reinhardt felt when she lost her father was still vivid.

She was the one who threw the child into the battlefield without knowing how big it was.

‘That was the first farewell to this child.’

Reinhardt left Wilhelm’s sorrow alone while she was drunk on her own emotions. It was said that Wilhelm stayed beside the empty coffin for three consecutive days. It was already saddening to look at the empty coffin, but she dare not count how large the heartbreak this child must’ve felt while next to the coffin for three whole days.

She released the hand that was holding Wilhelm and raised her gaze. How did he become this tall while he was gone? She now had to look up even though they were both kneeling. As she ran her hand across his rough cheek, she noticed that he had become a little tan. His long black hair was tied back as it fell to the nape of his neck, it was the size of two fingers.

Was there no one to cut his hair on the battlefield?

All of a sudden, she remembered the time when Dietrich laughed at her as she cut Wilhelm’s hair, and she fell into tears again in deep sorrow.

“Sorry. I’m sorry, Wilhelm….”

Reinhardt repeated the same thing over and over. Wilhelm looked down at her for a long time, then carefully reached out his hand and pulled her back.

“Don’t say that.”

“…… Wilhelm.”

The smell of dry grass wafted from the young man who had returned from the mountain where the still cold wind blew. Wilhelm hugged her slowly. Wilhelm held his breath, but Reinhardt also reached out and embraced him, letting out a long sigh of relief. Then he supported Reinhardt’s back with both of his arms as he held her tightly.

“Just tell me that you’re glad I am back.”

“…… okay.”

You are older than me.

Tears rolled down again on Reinhardt’s cheek that fell on Wilhelm’s chest.

“It’s good that you’re back, Wilhelm. Thank God. It’s good that you’re back safely….”

“I missed you.”

“Yeah, I missed you too.”

“I missed you, Rein.”

The young man continued to whisper softly in her ear.

You don’t know how much I missed you. Every dark night, I missed you, Rein….

The woman hugged the young man and cried. The young man did not cry. He just held her tighter. He kept whispering in her ear until she fell asleep, exhausted from crying.

Thanks for telling me that you are relieved (I am back).

Rein.

I….

There were no words that followed after that.

* * * 

Without the body, a memorial could not be built. Reinhardt built a tombstone and placed it on the hill most visible from her office. Only one name, Dietrich Ernst, was engraved.

She hasn’t cried anymore since that day. It wasn’t because she wasn’t sad anymore, but because everything had stopped before Reinhardt’s eyes could enjoy her sorrows. Mrs. Sarah was the first to express her troubles.

“The distinguished guests haven’t left.”

“Who are they?”

“… … Sir Fernaha Glencia, son of Marquess Glencia, and Baron Nathantine.”

Reinhardt frowned.

“It was Nathantine who said that it was a pity for Wilhelm. Even that Glencia fox?”

“He wanted to meet with you just once….”

It’s been a week since Dietrich’s funeral. Despite getting rich, Luden still did not come out of poverty. The longer these distinguished guests stay, the more Reinhardt will have to spend.

It’s not because the food to go to the VIPs is precious and expensive. Reinhardt had no intention of saving face, so both Fernaha Glencia or Baron Nathantine were filling their meals with potato soup and cornbread just like Reinhardt.

But what the big problem is that the distinguished guests weren’t only just one or two. The chef who would originally only make 30 servings of potato soup a day, was screaming that his arm was dying for making almost 60 servings. Though it was only an arm, it was more of a big problem that the estate’s warehouse was emptying at a frightening rate.

Though it was now late summer, they still have a long way to harvest. Their stored dry goods are almost all gone. They managed to catch food like summer rabbits, but that was their limit. Not only the people, but even their horses were also terrible. When Reinhardt heard that Thunder, Sir Glencia’s horse, was eating the straw equivalent for five donkeys of the Luden estate every day, she stood up indifferently.

“Soon, in autumn, our donkeys need to plow the fields and carry stones to block the winter wind. Sir Glencia’s warhorse wouldn’t let our donkeys starve, right?”

“…… Did you really call me for that?”

Fernaha Glencia was embarrassed when he heard her kicking him out. It was probably his first time to be kicked out over food.

‘It’s also my first time!’

Reinhardt thought so and crossed her arms. She was wealthy in her previous life and could feed a thousand horses. But now, it was more urgent to plow the potato field in front of the castle. In the land where potatoes were harvested, red radishes that grow during the winter had to be planted.

“Otherwise why else would I be meeting you?”

It was a pretty disrespectful attitude. In terms of title, Fernaha Glencia, son of Marquess Glencia, was only an appointed knight. Reinhardt wasn’t inferior since he hasn’t taken over the title yet… on the papers, legally.

‘Of course, there was no way that an ass**t like him would be acting like the Marquess.’

Mikhail Allanquez also treated Marquess Glencia with proper courtesy. That’s because, in her previous life, the northern barbarians were still active until she was 40. Without Marquess Glencia, the northern part of the Empire would be tantamount to opening a gate for the barbarians. But now it’s a little different – because of Wilhelm.

‘The infamous war chief and his son all died at the hands of Wilhelm….’

The barbarians won’t be able to reach the Imperial Border for the time being. During the three years of the Great War, the barbarians rapidly decreased, and their center also collapsed. So it was only natural for Reinhardt to be arrogant in front of Sir Fernaha Glencia.

It was obvious that Wilhelm was the reason why Sir Glencia was still sitting there wiping his forehead due to being humiliated by the fact that his horse eats too much. It was as she expected.

Fernaha Glencia then offered her seriously, “I’ll give you 100,000 Allanquez.”

100,000 Allanquez was enough to feed Helka’s 3,000 soldiers for 6 months in her previous life. Of course, in terms of the Luden Territory, they would be able to eat for the next 10 years. However, Reinhardt showed a serious expression in front of Fernaha, as if it was a dog who was giving her the 100,000 Allanquez.

“That’s not enough.”

(T/N: So I only realized now how many years is Reinhardt older than Wilhelm qAq )